No more excuses, just fucking do it.
So, so badly. I can’t talk about it. I can’t fix it. I can stick with it or give it up. Both options make me want to vomit. It hurts. It just hurts. I don’t know what happened. I don’t know why. I don’t know anything. I just know hurt.
When you, you, you, and you asked. The answer isn’t “great,” “happy,” “well,” or “lovely”… It’s “fucking miserably.”
I want to vanish. I fucking hate this all. I can’t stand my own existence most days; it’s understandable that others can’t, either, I guess.
Feeling like this.
Some days it’s better to just ignore it entirely, but others it completely consumes me.
More often than not, most members of your family ignore you.
I should call my daddy tomorrow. Starting to understand what he always vented to me about.
Guess it’s good I’ve formed my own little family. It’s tragic yet poetic.
I wish he would just assure me he’s truly got the intent to marry me. We talk about it and he wants to and whatnot but idk if he will ever actually ask. I’m sure he’ll just do what he did when we got back together this last time and change our relationship status without telling me. Haha. Idk. I’m being emo and girly. I love him and want him forever. Don’t comment with some douchebaggery, please. I’m just venting the one place I can. 💗
He was going to be a complete douche and stop talking to me… Wtf is up with the rest of you?! Idk why I fucking try anymore… I just feel neglected and foolish.
I quit smoking. Am on a job hunt. Changed my degree. Have more secrets than a cemetery. Am glad none of you are part of this… *sarcasm*
This is normal. You’re not alone. You might not believe it, but it’s what most go through. You will survive. You will succeed. You will be happy. Just wait it out…
That I can’t tell anyone! :(
Anyway, interview tomorrow morning and then a doctor appointment again for Emma’s ear infection. Wish me luck with both!
A deep-dish pizza. A legit one. Preferably homemade. I’d be so happy and full. Make my dreams come true?!
Always so beat.
Everything requires so much from me and the only thing that seems to give back is parenting… She is the sunshine of my life and reminds me of why I even bother with anything… Work, life, everything…
Just so exhausted. So sick. So tired. So sick and tired.
I need a better job… Desperately.
Do dumb exes think, months later, that they could or would possibly be relevant at all? Not like an ex someone was bffs with… More so someone to pass the time with for two or three months… After being blatantly told by multiple people to back the fuck off, why would you ever think your drunken phone calls, messages, and overall pathetic existence would matter? Get over yourself.
Le sigh. Dumb bitches.
Reading a little then sleeping. Work until Tuesday. Joyyyyyyy.